This one got me thinking:
“When friends or family called and asked, ‘So what are you doing these days?’ I did not have the knowledge to know that I was undoing. In retrospect I can tell you that the ‘doing’of our chosen work comes easy. It is this time of undoing that requires every ounce of strength, vision and persistence. It is meeting the faith-bashing denouncer, and journaling, praying and processing your way back to your true-heartedness, the part of you that dreams your dream and knows the shortest path to the quickest stream. Every belief that ever held you back from your desires will now come forth and stand before your door. This is what this time is for. It will make you stand in your strength as you have never done before” (Tama Kieves)
I started repacking my car today, getting ready for the next leg of my trip; it’s a week off, but I am starting to feel revved up, made fresh, sleeker maybe with the hot yoga, buoyed by the peaceful Minnesota winds.
Such a contrast to my whirling dervish mind over the last month. So much to undo from, become aware of even, accept, and in some cases, although I am always at best a work in progress, take action to let go of and move on.
Here’s a list of knots within myself that I’ve encountered and actions I’ve taken to become undone:
- There are some people in my past, who no longer serve me, that try to challenge my choices and happiness. I simply blocked them from my phone.
- Those same people sometimes saber rattle in my head. I lie on my yoga mat and breathe deeply practicing the Hamsa Mantra.
- Long periods of sustained stillness can be scary. I have walked the shores of Lake Minnetonka a lot.
- “I must, I should, if only, I have so much to do.” I stopped, did nothing, called a supportive friend.
- “I’m not sure I should feel this good. ” Yes I should. I deserve to be really, really happy.
- Figuring it all out. A lot of people who have my back, have found this obstacle the most entertaining. Laugh out loud funny. I’ve ultimately laughed with them.
- Plans. I have literally had none. The gratitude that swirls around being only beholden to me is a source of inspiration I believe I will dip into for the rest of my life.
- The rest of my life….Is a day to day process. This morning I got invited to a Music Potluck in the Sonoma Redwood Forest on the day I arrive in Santa Rosa. Totally random and unexpected.
- My children….Tell me they are more than ok. And this point of reference, although new for me, invites a hell of a lot of freedom.
- There is nothing to prove. I just have to open my heart, embrace the lovely, swirly messiness that comes with living in the moment and Be, just be, me!
Big Loving Namaste!