I have to confess that I sometimes find being me a tough row to hoe. I’m not complaining, it’s more of an awareness that I don’t always rest easy in my own skin. I wrestle around as if I have something within me that I need to pin to the ground, submit, domesticate, corner. It’s discombobulating and edgy, and sometimes makes me feel like running for the hills. But I’m trying to rest easy with this unevenness; pretty sure that its motive emanates from a restless spirit, not meant to harm or induce fear.
Meeting my edge is a heart palpitating experience both on and off the mat. It is the moment where the Spirit of me has an opportunity to expand, transform and connect with Bliss; limitless peace, joy, unconditional love that exists within and without me at all times, and yet is obscured and sublimated by the mundane experiences of daily living. Obviously, I’ve not yet made complete peace with Bliss, still sometimes struggling with trust, unable to stay in the moment, pissed off at the unknown.
But I’m bold now, courageous, daring myself to remain in vulnerability. And I’m not alone, surrounded by a cloak of invincibility created by the love and support of so many other quavering spirits; coalescing and interconnecting in a mysterious unfathomable fashion that sustains me and coaxes me to lean forward on my precipitous edge.
And they all lean forward too…….
Big Loving Namaste!