Today, for the first time in a really long time, I spent almost the entire day in bed because I was more than a little bit sick. I actually cancelled my yoga appointments, made Kitchari, drank a lot of ginger tea and reassured myself that not only was this restorative action a smart thing to do, but one that was an indicator of my dramatically improved relationship with myself.
This proactive self-care is new behavior for me, and I like it a lot; sometimes doing one impossible thing appears so mundane on the surface that it takes a while for its awesomeness to rise up and exuberantly wake me up to myself. It’s really important to me that I take care of myself well, respond to my needs, nurture my sometimes aching body, soothe my blazing soul.
Resting has never come easy to me. But as I learn to love and appreciate myself in this deep and unfathomable way, being still and mindful to my own needs to rejuvenate and refresh has become a much more open and illuminating process. There is so much comfort in gentle self-care and, dare I say, more than a little joy. I’m grateful for it.
So, on this day when I reveled in my own nothingness, I realized that this silent, quiet, reflective time was as Big a moment for me as any other I have had throughout this whole year.
Could this be true love? I have never imagined love this way before, but I think it must be; to connect to myself with such mystifying stillness and just breathe….love inhaled, love exhaled, over and over and over again…..quite moving and profound.
And I feel so so much better!