“DO NOT LET THE BEHAVIOR OF OTHERS DESTROY YOUR INNER PEACE.” (Dalai Lama)
So, this post is a little late because lovely Sasha called me yesterday in the middle of my somewhat hectic schedule and asked me for help. The issue is a familiar one, I have a lot of past experience with it as well, and essentially revolves around her relationship with her father.
I find these sudden, and for me quite unexpected, moments of reaching out to be so courageous and powerful, that I am bowled over by the inherent invitation to expand and grow and change that exists within the pain. You see, Sasha is my only daughter, and will celebrate her 20th birthday just four days after I commemorate my 50th. We are inextricably and permanently linked, ferociously in love, and on similar paths in journeying to love ourselves strongly while detaching from those people, places and things that continue to choose to make harm with crazy choices, motivations and compulsions.
My experience, strength and hope served me well last night as I tried to gently explain to Sasha that her broken heart with regard to her father was not only a completely justifiable feeling but also an inevitable one when addiction is a part of the plan. “You cannot take responsibility for the way that he is any longer, Sasha. You never had to, his life is his to make and you must let him make it.”
And within that somewhat convoluted sentence is a prayer, a glimmer of the light that exists in releasing those that we love to their own Higher Power and their own way of life.
I’m not sure Sasha was completely comforted, but I did sense that she felt stronger; perhaps emboldened by something igniting within her own heart that felt a lot like the deep abiding love she gives out so freely to every single person that she meets. It’s tender to live so openly, to want so much, to believe so strongly, and to still accept, let go, breathe deeply and Be.
Within the action of Being, the graciousness of Spirit, one’s own melded with every other, becomes a glimmering source for goodness, sometimes righteousness and oftentimes peace. I have so much hope for Sasha, as I do for all four of my gentle loving spirited children, that they will feel the strong burning essence of who they really are within them, and let it out for the benefit of themselves and others, exuberantly and passionately; living their respective lives to the fullest, one day at a time, because they can, and I believe because they know, that they will always be buoyed by my strength, my love and my complete and total faith in the power of their own hearts.
Love you Zaz!